( published 21st May 2003 )

Hi All,

my specialty ( as a lot among you will testify ) is to talk first, think later. My friend Jeff is such a great philosopher, he told me a little story that should make me think twice before opening my mouth.

Jeff attended once a party organised by a Danish bank, a large picnic on the green for bank employees and their families. Those guys were just playing some soft version of baseball, using tennisballs. Jeff, as a good American, arrived with his true American bats and balls, and convinced a few players to use his "tools". After a few minutes BANG Jeff hit one hell of a shot, and his heavy baseball went up to the air, right to the other side of the green. There a man was sitting with his wife and kids, and he saw this ball coming down towards them. Assuming it was one of the tennisballs he stood up like a mad man and shouted "Mine, Mine" ( must have been a trader ), and without hesitation he started running, following the ball's path, and hit the ball with a header. a sack of potatoes the body dropped to the floor, the guy was knocked out. Thank God ( see, I talk to God all the time ), nothing major, no ambulance was needed.

Alex and all the lads and ladies out there, this message was for you: don't chase any balls without knowing if they are soft balls or hard balls ( hmmm, don't know, sounds pretty ambiguous what I just said ).

Have a nice day

Received from a Dane ( the one who hit the ball??? ):
Two blondes were sunbathing in the garden naked.
Suddenly one of the blondes says:
"What a big clitoris you have"
The other blonde replies:
"I don't know, usually it's my husband who is looking after the garden".

© Alex Alexandrino 2000-2002