Big Bob and The Twins
( published 7th May 2002 )

Hi Folks,

Last Friday's morning mail included a funny expression to describe man's masterpiece! This provoked the following ( scientific ) message from one of my young excited female readers:


You know Alex, this morning's mail has made me realise that you can help me find the answer to something I've always been curious about. I've always wanted to know... how many men have names for their... you know... their...

In my (admittedly not extensive experience) about 40% have (and talked to/about them by name as if they were a third party in the relationship) and the rest did not, thinking it completely ridiculous to do so. Can we do a poll of the morning mail readers???!!! ..."

So here we go again with our interactivity:

Boys ( and Girls ) please send me all the different names you can think of ( also in French, Portuguese etc ) to , and reasons why you think people do so, and I'll try to release them tomorrow. Deadline tomorrow morning 6am.

Have a nice day

An old lady dies and goes to heaven and is chatting to St Peter at the Pearly Gates when all of a sudden she hears the most awful blood-curdling screams. "Don't worry about that," says St Peter, "it's only someone having the holes bored on their shoulder blades for the wings."
The old lady looks a little uncomfortable but carries on with the conversation. Ten minutes later, there are more blood-curdling screams.
"Oh my God," says the old lady, "now what is happening"?
"Not to worry," says St Peter, "they are just having their head drilled to fit the halo."
"I can't do this," says the old lady, "I'm off down to hell."
"You can't go there," says St Peter, "You'll be raped and sodomized."
"Yes, but I've already got the holes for that," says the old lady.