( published 26th February 2002 )


Hi All,

My apologies to all those who wondered yesterday morning what the hell I was talking about with my "Olympic Campaign". It's just that I'm starting to be fed up with all the doping cases around sports. Look at me, the only motivation I have to do sports is the well deserved pasta I'll have afterwards. I hope I will never need to give blood samples otherwise they'll ban me for life.

I'm off traveling for the rest of the week, so do not panic if there is no message in your inbox for a few days. I will do my best to update the Eurofootie results on Thursday ( for those who are taking part ). Anyway every morning have a look at this page, I might update it every day.

Meantime have fun. Life is short, remember?


"Look Michael, look what I've made." Said God. Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?" "It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance." "Balance?" inquired Michael, still confused. "For example, North America will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while South America is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hot spot and Russia will be a cold spot. Over there I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people," The Archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed to a small landmass and said, "What's that one?" "Ah," said God. "That's Britain, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful lakes, rivers, streams and hills. The people from Britain are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard-working and high-achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace." Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about balance, God? You said there will be BALANCE!" God replied wisely, "Wait until you see the wankers I'm putting next to them in France."

And now the French version: "Regarde Michel, regarde ce que j'ai fait..." guess the end!