( published 23rd January 2002 )
A few weeks ago I acquired a season ticket for Charlton AC football club, so I can watch the remaining home matches of Charlton against teams like Manchester Utd, Chelsea or Arsenal.
On monday evening, just fresh from Gatwick airport I went to my first match, Charlton-Aston Villa. I arrived a bit late so it took me a few minutes to find my seat, then another few minutes to recognise my team on the pitch ( oh yes, the red ones ). I hadn't missed much of the game, as I managed to see the first goal, and that happened after only 8 minutes...My neighbours didn't cheer, so I realised Charlton was 1-0 down.
I was starving, and at half time I was looking forward to a good burger or hotdog, when I realised I only had Euros in my pocket...So I watched the others enjoying their meals and beers with a shy smile.
Finally I had to listen to my neighbour shouting "What are you doing, you fucking Spaniard" when Charlton's Jorge Costa missed a ball...he is Portuguese, but for a Charlton fan "what's the fuckin' difference anyway?" Aaaaaaahhhh, in the end we lost 2-1, but I'm definitely going back on Saturday. It's fun.
Have a nice day
A woman goes to her boyfriends' parents' house for dinner. This is to be her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal. The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost making tears come to her eyes and lets out a dainty fart. It wasn't loud, but everyone at the table heard the poof. Before she even had a chance to be embarrassed, her boyfriend's Father looked over at the dog that had been snoozing at the woman's feet and said in a rather stern voice, "Skippy!" A couple of minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again.. This time, she didn't even hesitate. She let a much louder and longer fart rip. The father again looked and the dog and yelled, "Dammit Skippy!" Once again the woman smiled and thought "Yes!". A few minutes later the woman had to let another one rip. This time she didn't even think about it. She let rip a fart that rivalled a train whistle blowing. Once again, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled, "Dammit Skippy, get away from her before she shits on you!".