Supermarket Fun ( again )
EUROFOOTIE 2001/2002 DAYS -5
Seen in supermarkets in London:
1) Category "Feel and imagine"
Boots condoms: "Straight teat ended condoms natural latex"
Durex condoms: "Xtra Pleasure" condoms are uniquely shaped to intensify stimulation. The oversized tip has an exclusive shape designed to enhance sensation delivering heightened stimulation for both partners, easy to put on, very comfortable and very safe" .
Aaaaaahhhh, how romantic...
2) Category "How to get rid of rotten fruit?"
Tesco's "Eat Me - Keep Me Bananas" :
in a plastic bag ( always plastic of course ), green bananas alongside ripe yellow bananas - some you eat today, you keep the green ones for tomorrow ( but hurry, usually the green ones turn black, without going through yellow phase - defying the logic of colour mixing )
3) Category "Mystery" Tesco's "Funsize Oranges"
Don't know what they look like, sold out - must be big hit !!
4) Category "I love Animals"
Sainsbury's liquid soap: " Sainsbury's is against animal testing!" ( yes, but where does it say on this shit box, that this soap hasn't been tested on animals????? ).
Who said, shopping is boring?
Have a nice day
Translated from French ( although old and famous ): Old "Mathilde" is dying. She tells her husband Maurice to open a drawer and take out a wooden box. He opens it, and finds 3 eggs and 15,000 French Francs. "What's this?" he asks. "Well, says Mathilde, over the last 40 years, every time I faked orgasm when we made love, I put an egg in that box." Hmmm, thinks Maurice, 3 eggs in 40 years, it's not too bad. "What about the 15,000 francs," he asks. Mathilde:"Every time I reached the dozen eggs, I went to the market and sold them..."