Tuesday, 10th July 2001

Mothers in Law

Hi All,

Sorry for yesterday I simply overslept. The trip from Luxembourg had been tiring. Plus the fact it is more difficult to get up early when you're sleeping on a mattress on the floor, much much tougher. It is easy to let you "fall off" your bed, isn't it.

Karine's mum is over here visiting, it is only normal to offer her our bedroom. She must find it weird to see that nutter writing e-mails at 6.30 in the morning in the kitchen.

By the way did you know that mother in law is called Schweiermamm in Luxembourg? Translated it gives "Heavy Mum". Does this mean that all mothers in law in Luxembourg are fat? Hmmm, why do they call them heavy? In France they are more hypocritical. French do not like their mothers in law, whole plays have been written around that, French men try to live as far away from their mothers in law as possible. Still they call them "belle-maman", beautiful mum, what a bunch of cheap liars. In Germany they show more respect, they call them "Schwiegermutter": try to say it outloud, doesn't that inspire "Disziplin und Respekt"? Finally in Portugal men have got a big mouth, but in reality they are "softies" run by their women: first comes the mother, then the wife, then the "sogra", the mother in law. "Sogrrrra", you have to roll the "RRR", isn't that scary??? Portuguese are so family driven, they try to gather the whole family for lunch on Sundays, i.e. wife, kids, MOTHERS, MOTHERS IN LAW, oh my God! No wonder Portuguese men love football, after lunch hey let's run to the stadium.

I cannot complain, Karine's mum is always treating me like a king. And she is in Luxembourg, I am in London. We see each others in average once a month. That's the ideal combination. Like the French say when they're advertising an alcoholic drink: "A consommer avec moderation" ( moderate consumption ).

Weird, weird world

Have a nice day


This guy lives alone and he was feeling a bit lonely, so he goes to the pet shop to get something to keep him company. The pet shop owner suggested an unusual pet, a talking millipede. "OK," thought the man, "I'll give it a go..." So he bought a millipede, took it home, and for lack of advance preparations made it a temporary home in a cardboard box. That evening testing his new pet, he leaned over the closed box and said, "I'm going to the pub for a drink, do you want to come too?" He waited a few moments but there was no reply. He tried again, "Hey, millipede, wanna come to the boozer with me???" Again, no response. Disgusted by his gullible nature, he decided to give it one more try before returning the millipede to the pet shop. So he got real close to the box and repeated rather loudly , "I SAID I'M GOING TO THE PUB FOR A DRINK. DO YOU WANNA COME?" "For God's sake, I heard you the first time!!" snapped the millipede, "I'm just putting my fuckin' shoes on..."

Thanks Chris